It's Not Cool

We had a a major water main break yesterday at our second home (small condo complex) where my twenty-two-year-old son is living while he goes to school.

When one of the owners found the break, she created a group text to let everyone know. As expected, there was a stream of questions and texts that followed. When my son chimed in, he simply wrote, "Cool." Later in the conversation, he responded to a comment, "If you guys need help, I will be home by two."

Behind the scenes, I confess to fussing at him for responding to a disaster with, "Cool," and to referring to a group that included several older women as "guys."

Am I out of touch? Shouldn't one know their audience even in texting? Should I have bitten my tongue given his age? He's bright and polite, but I confess that texting his elders like he texts his pals stepped on a nerve.

Re: It's Not Cool

My son is much the same. Well
Mannered in person but his texts are what I consider short and abrupt. That’s just the way this generation is.

Re: It's Not Cool

Language evolves. At least he answered and offered help. I'd happily be helped by someone who texted me "yo dude, laters" than someone who was either very polite grammatically but didn't turn up, or didn't reach out at all.

Re: It's Not Cool

Hi

Par for the course Surfermom.

Our parents felt the same about us.

Re: It's Not Cool

True! True! That is why I am now conflicted about having crossed him.

Indeed! My mother is in her eighties and still corrects our grammar. I love her for that.

Re: It's Not Cool

It's absolutely not cool - in fact it is downright slovenly.

Re: It's Not Cool

I think its the youngsters today . If you listen to people on tv they greet us all as GUYS . My grandkids say it and even i say it .

Cool - ok got it - i understand - i know - message received

Guys - everyone including young and old

I got told off recently by an 82 year old long term friend of mine when i said " lovely to see you guys "

She tore me down a strip or two i wont say it to her and her hubby again

Re: It's Not Cool

I can’t see anything wrong with that,imo.

At least he doesn’t say “A” after mishearing what someone has said to me,one woman said to me “A”!!!!....don’t you mean “ pardon”!....so I said. “A”. that has got to be one of the annoying things anyone can say to me.

Please don’t correct my grammar, ..if I’m not accepted for who I am then they can “A” off....sorry surfermun I don’t get where you are coming from....

Are you trying to get him to text / behave as you want him to, he’s an adult..not a child......

I can think of far worse things he could be saying than that, I also call everyone guys, “ Hey Guys” most of the time.

Re: It's Not Cool

Dexterous, That’s exactly what l was going to say!
At least he had the manners and the decency to contact the ladies.

Surfermom, What should he have said? ’Hi you old crud’s, sort it out yourselves’?

Re: It's Not Cool

Good and humorous insights all around! Thank you! :023

Here is what happened after the texts. It is so rare that I correct him, given his age, that I stewed enough to bring it up when he was at the house - more about the issue of my complaining than the texting.

He said that regretted writing "Cool" the second he hit the send button because...

With the break, several of the older residents were suddenly in a lot of trouble - about to face flooding with no where else to go knowing we would be facing days without repair on a holiday weekend. "Cool" came across as flippant and immature.

He didn't think "guys" was a problem, but I maintained that it was too familiar with this group of older ladies. "Everyone" or "You all" is much better and safer. My daughter, his twin, isn't bothered by "guys," but she said she would neeeeever (she stretched it out) refer to her elders as such. I asked them what they thought about calling females as "dude" as I have sometime heard in younger people. They didn't like that especially girls calling other girls dude, though I can see this evolving into the lexicon in the same way "guys" has. Is there really any difference?

My son has told me in the past that he was glad I corrected his grammar when he was growing up, so I asked him if whether or not it bothered him that I had complained about the text - given his age. He laughed and said that it was, "just a mom thing" and confirmed that as much as he didn't like the criticism (fair enough), he had really benefitted from the corrections over the years.

Besides, he recollected (and I had forgotten), we once agreed that if I corrected his grammar, he could nudge me to stand up straight when I was caught slumping - which I very much appreciate. We both agreed that attempts to otherwise "boss him around' was a bad idea and that on that charge, I was found (mostly, touchè ) not guilty.

By the way, I believe that only people who should ever correct grammar is one's mother or teacher, or colleague (if it is a matter of written, work-related communication).

Now, I have to stand up straight and get to work.