Predicting a happy marriage or not

Nathan went to a wedding yesterday, came back convinced they won't last more than a year , apparently speeches by best man and groom and grooms parents all omitted to mention the bride !

The brides side all used it as an occasion to ridicule the groom.

I can see why he thinks they won't last.

It makes me wonder why some people marry. Over the years we've been to many weddings and not that many last, looking back the signs were often there before they married.

Can you tell if a marriage will last ?

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

I am not sure Julie. In many marriages family members interfere too much and that puts the couple in a position of taking sides.
I always feel that the families should accept the choice their son/daughter has made... but just be there for them if things don't work out.
I often feel that, unless you enter marriage believing it to be a lifetime commitment, it has of little chance of succeeding.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

I agree twink, I was listening to radio yesterday they had an article suggesting long time marriages are over and we should all aim for lots of little ones. Talk about giving up too easy. The one thing we meant in our service was til death us depart. If you don't mean that no point going into it.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

I agree Twink. Sometimes families do interfere too much.

They keep wanting to know when the big day will be, and as soon as they are wed they want to know when they will start a family.
Sometimes in-laws don't get on with the new dil/sil and take sides in disputes etc. It causes trouble.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

That's very true we kept our two families as far apart as we could, loved my nan and my mil but they would have killed each other if they'd met very often !

We had an odd situation where my lot always took my husband's side in any dispute and my mil took mine nowt so strange as folk as they say.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

When i married in 1972 My husbands mum and dad became my best friends and i really got on well with them. Sadly his dad died soon after we divorced , after 16 years of marriage, but his mum, who is now in her 90's is still one of my best friends.
So is my ex husband for that matter!

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

No, I don't think we can TBH Julie. One's view of how a marriage 'should' be, isn't another's view.

My friend and her husband go out separately with their own friends regularly. My husband at the time thought it was odd and predicted the marriage wouldn't last.

Our marriage failed (my fault) and theirs is still extremely happy nearly 40yrs later

I've been lucky with in-laws so can't comment too much on that

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

That's interesting pesta I do understand that all marriages are different we are apart this weekend, Stevens at the caravan I stayed home that would suit every married couple but I think we are strong enough to do it and it gives my husband time on his own that he craves at times.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

Yes, I agree with time on one's one. 'Needing my space' is what I used to say. I think it important and it doesn't mean, IMO, that you love them any less.

Re: Predicting a happy marriage or not

I went to the second marriage of my boss, a hospital consultant. As I stood there in the church and when the vicar got to the part where it is asked if anyone knows of a just cause etc.. I felt like standing up and saying that I knew he was a two timing b...... I knew that he had been stringing along a nurse as well is his fiance. He did not tell the nurse he was marrying (that week), but sent her a bouquet of flowers the day before his wedding. His bride had two teenage children, he bought them all a brand new house and within the year the marriage was over - she and the kids got the house. Poetic justice or what?