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Rehab44
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02-10-2017, 04:47 PM
1

Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

Picked this up from a mate on Facebook
I think this is logical and makes perfectly good sense!!!!!.
I mowed the lawn today, and after doing so I sat down and had a cold beer.
The day was really quite beautiful, and the drink facilitated some deep thinking. My wife walked by and asked me what I was doing, and I said, "Nothing."
The reason I said "nothing" instead of saying "just thinking" is because she then would have asked, "About what?"
At that point I would have had to explain that men are deep thinkers about various topics, which would lead to other questions.
Finally, I pondered an age old question: Is giving birth more painful than getting kicked in the nuts?
Women always maintain that giving birth is way more painful than a guy getting kicked in the nuts, but how could they know?
Well, after another beer, and some more heavy deductive thinking, I have come up with an answer to that question.
Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion.
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."
On the other hand, you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."
I rest my case. Time for another beer, and then maybe a nap.
There you go, that’s real wisdom.
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02-10-2017, 05:31 PM
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Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

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02-10-2017, 05:43 PM
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Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

You realise you are heading for big trouble anytime now don't you, Rehab!
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02-10-2017, 05:48 PM
4

Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

Originally Posted by mups ->
you realise you are heading for big trouble anytime now don't you, rehab!
Dont be silly Mups........more likely he is heading for another kick in the nuts.
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02-10-2017, 05:49 PM
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Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

He could be couldn't he ... Mups, d'you reckon we should get a stretcher ready to cart him off to safety.
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02-10-2017, 05:50 PM
6

Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

Originally Posted by Twink55 ->
Dont be silly Mups........more likely he is heading for another kick in the nuts.
But ... .. a bit like C-sections are becoming more popular perhaps he'd prefer surgical removal.
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02-10-2017, 05:56 PM
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Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

Two house bricks ?
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02-10-2017, 05:58 PM
8

Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

There you are Rehab, your fate is sealed in less than an hour.
Told you you'd be in trouble didn't I, but No, you carried on regardless.
Be afraid ..... be very afraid.

Mort, get the stretcher ready.


*

*

He's done a runner already.
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02-10-2017, 05:59 PM
9

Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

Originally Posted by Morticia ->
But ... .. a bit like C-sections are becoming more popular perhaps he'd prefer surgical removal.
I am sure I could do that for him, with no waiting. He just needs to jump on my kitchen table and they will be off in no time.
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02-10-2017, 06:40 PM
10

Re: Timeless Knowledge that only blokes know.

We are deep thinkers, Rehab...we analyse everything before committing ourselves.

An example....I was in the pub last week when a guy I know asked me for a light.

I thought about and the conversation went a bit like this.

"Hey, Terry, have you got a light?"

I looked at him and replied "If I give you a light we'll start chatting"

"After a while you'll ask if I want a pint and 'd accept, feeling obliged I'd offer one back"

"This will go on all night until last orders"

"You'll suggest a curry and we'll eat and drink a few more at some point your wife will phone and an arguement" will ensue, you'll inform me that she's kicked you out, I'll then offer you my couch to sleep on"

"We go back to mine and get our heads down"

"In the morning I'll come down to find you having sex with my wife"

The guy then says "I won't Terry, Honest"


"I know you won't, you're not having a f*****g light"##.
 
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