10-02-2016, 08:46 AM
1
Cornucopia
My sex life hardly exists anymore, so I've converted to Islamand changed my name too Seldom Bin Laid!
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I bought some'Jamie Oliver Sausages' yesterday. On the packet
it said 'Prick with a fork. I thought, can't argue with that!
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When cooking Alphabet Soup, don't leave it unattended,
it could spell disaster.
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I had a row with my wife last night, she threw a bottle of fabric
conditioner at me and it only just missed my head. It must have
been Lenor because it was a bit too close for Comfort.
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I love that new Korean vegetarian snack pot. Not Poodle.
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If sex with two people is called a twosome and sex involving three
people is called a threesome now I understand why they call me
handsome!
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Just bought an ABBA toilet....what a loo!
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I've swapped our bed for a trampoline. My wife hit the roof!
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Two Thai girls asked me if I'd like to go bed with them; they said
it would be just like winning Lotto! I agreed, and they were right.
We all stripped off, and to my horror, we had six matching balls!
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Got a new Jack Russell pup today. He's mainly black and brown
with just a small white area. I've called him Birmingham.
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