Aunt Karen

Got this one from a friend in an e-mail

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:

The kids had to ask their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

"Tony, do you have a story to share?"

"Yes ma'am. My daddy told a story about my Aunt Karen."

She was a pilot in Iraq War and her plane got hit.
She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife.

She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then her parachute landed right in the middle of twenty enemy troops."

"She shot fifteen of them with the gun until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands."

"Good Heavens" said the horrified teacher.
"What kind of moral did your daddy tell you from this horrible story?"

"Stay the f**k away from Aunt Karen when she's drinking."

Re: Aunt Karen

Parents were thinking about punishing their children for swearing

Child one comes to breakfast

"what would you like?"

Some ****ing Cheerioes.

Smack

Second child comes down

What would you like ?

Anything apart from ****ing cheerioes-you get hit for that

Never assume you have the target.

70s old Git who did Psychology