if only

I come from a family of 7 . Situations and life has separated us all and many miles are between us . I left home very young at 16 , as did we all , and the years gone by . My second youngest brother now 56 came to dorset for the weekend and we met last night . How sad I felt that although we are brother and sister the bond was there yet we know so little of each other . We enjoyed the memories of being young and both had a few tears of times lost . I cried driving home thinking of how I would have so loved to have lived closer to have known my brothers , to have had the love and support and also been there for them all .

I envy those who have had family close by , to be part of and belong .

He's now driving back to his home , of course we will stay in text and the odd phone call as we've done , he has his life as do I .

The 'if only' feeling leaves me emotional , feelings come up that have been buried deeply coming to the surface . It's strange how overwhelming lost and buried emotions can be .

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Like you Susan I come from a largish family of 4 . I am the youngest.
My eldest sister died some years ago so it is just the 3 of us now.

My other two siblings live over 100 miles away and we don't meet very often but modern technology makes this less of a problem, we all use Skype

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I was an only child, but my parents gave me a wonderful life, so I never missed not having any brothers or sisters.

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Susan - we are very much alike
Always I longed for a close family and it consumed me through the years but no matter how hard I tried we just didn't share a bond
I lived with wonderful foster parents for a couple of years, I suddenly had brothers and a dog and the best Mum and Dad, so at least I did experience family life at its best, for a while ................

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I'm an orphan

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give my best to your brother John (crabby) when you speak to him next Susan

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There were 5 of us 2 girls 3 boys.

The eldest my sister died 2 years ago and I didn't even know, till maybe 2 months later I have a brother I haven,t seen in nearly 30 years, he vanished nobody knows where.
The youngest brother well enough said there not spoken to him in a good number of years.

Second to the eldest, my brother I love him to bits and we see each other every week, now he is quite ill

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I came from a family of five, all older than me ,the youngest was nine when I arrived, now all three brothers have died,and my sister , almost seventeen years older , died ten years ago. Like Susan we were not a very close family,we kept in touch but hardly saw each other. I loved my sister but we had little in common,we both had very different lives, as we lived near each other we kept in touch daily ,and were there if the other one needed them. I do miss her. I have many nephews and nieces, I keep in touch with the eldest by e.mail,but we live a long way from each other. I kept in touch with one niece by phone but she has just died, we didnt live very far apart and both kept saying we would meet up , but ,we never did. The others I hear about occasionally through one S.I.L still living. I think because mos families have had to move to different parts of the Country we lose touch with each other, our lives are busy, transport is sometimes difficult ,we always mean to ' call/see' someone ,but somehow it gets put off till 'tomorrow' ,which never comes. Small families find it easier to keep in touch because there are not so many of them

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I was the youngest of four. My siblings were a lot older than me and my old girl probably thought that she was too old to get preggers.

My elder brother died some years ago and I haven't seen my other brother or sister for 20 odd years. I don't even know if my brother is still around. I maybe get a Christmas card from my sister, but that's all. They did organise a family reunion some years ago, but I didn't go. I've got no desire to meet up with people I have a tenuous genetic link to, but have nothing in common otherwise. It doesn't worry me.

On the other side of the coin, my neighbour here lives walking distance from her family and they seem to live in each other's houses. I love my children, but that's my idea of hell!

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Oh! Dear solo.
How sad.
But you obviously overcame the difficulties of that to become a very nice Woman.