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24-01-2010, 10:39 PM
1

Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

A far more accurate account of the events of that fateful morning....


Baby bear goes downstairs, sits in his small chair at the table.
He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?' he squeaks.

Daddy Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair. He looks into his big bowl and it is also empty. 'Who's been eating my porridge?!?' he roars.

Mummy Bear puts her head t hr ough the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, 'For God's sake, how many times do I have to go through this with you idiots? It was Mummy Bear who got up first. It was Mummy Bear who woke everyone in the house. It was Mummy Bear who made the coffee. It was Mummy Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night and put everything away. It was Mummy Bear who swept the floor in the kitchen. It was Mummy Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch The newspaper and croissants. It was Mummy Bear who set the damn table.

'It was Mummy Bear who walked the bloody dog, cleaned the cat's litter tray, gave them their food, and refilled their water.

'And now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-arses downstairs and grace Mummy Bear with your grumpy presence, listen carefully, because I'm only going to say this once....



'I HAVEN'T MADE THE *******Porridge yet
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24-01-2010, 11:27 PM
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Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

love it!
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25-01-2010, 04:58 PM
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Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

And Daddy Bear again smiled to himself. The pan he had soaked the oats in was in the dishwasher. The oats were thrown away.

When will this woman get up before me he asked ??

I put them on to simmer and went to shower so I was nice and smelling fresh and she just got up and thrown them away
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25-01-2010, 05:06 PM
4

Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

Strange that they had not bumped into each other when mummy bear was feeding the dog, sweeping the floor ect. ect. ect.
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25-01-2010, 05:13 PM
5

Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

True-Daddy was ironing, planning the supper and loading the washing machine

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25-01-2010, 05:15 PM
6

Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

Hey ho-Fairy tales??
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25-01-2010, 05:16 PM
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Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

And probably wearing his invisible cloak, I can't find mine anywhere.
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25-01-2010, 05:19 PM
8

Re: Once Upon a Time There Were Three Bears

I`m not a perfect hubby-but I can do some things.
 



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