16-01-2015, 11:19 PM
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HOW TO CATCH A DRAGON by james corrected by sue
A lot of people who come to wales want to know the best way of catching a DRAGON.This is a trickey job and one that needs proper preparation.
You will need the following.
Large spade, brown sheet 8ft by 6ft, large chicken, bottle of whisky, rope.
Dragons like any sort of meat but beef, lamb and pork are so expensive today that a chicken is your only option, dragons dont really mind a bit of chicken, they dont like rabbits or hedgehogs so dont even think about it.
First of all you must find a local wood where a dragon has been spotted wandering around aimlessly. Its best to go when its getting dark because this is when they like looking for a bit of food.
You must keep warm so the best thing is to open the bottle of whisky and have about four shots.
1) Dig a big hole and scatter the earth around on the woodland floor.
2) Be careful not to fall in the hole.
3) Cover the hole with the large brown sheet and hold it down with stones or bits of wood that you find around, the dragon will not notice this.
4) Have three more shots of whisky.
5) Place a whole chicken in the middle of the sheet over the hole.
6) Lay down behind a tree until the the dragon arrives and drink more of the whisky, dragons dont like whisky so you can drink as much as you like of it.
7) When the dragon turns up he will go for the chicken and fall down the hole.
8) When you wake up you go over to the hole and negotiate with the dragon over his release. Dont worry if he gets a bit nasty, in the end he will realise that he has to behave and speak nicely. Feel free to finish off the whisky
9) Normally one would settle for some magic potion or a bag of gold coins which the dragon will be carrying around his neck.
I have never actually caught a dragon this way so you might be able to strike a better deal with him than me, but I have been out there many times and drank lots of whisky.
written by james, and spell corrected by sue.
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