Flattery v Compliment

I always compliment someone if I like something but, I was horrified to discover today that 'flattery' means insincere... I thought to compliment - flatter, was the same meaning... I would 'never' say I like something - if I dont, so do not class myself as insincere... Confused on this one......

Re: Flattery v Compliment

Flattery is when you say something complimentary without meaning it. Compliments are (supposedly!) a sincere appreciation of someone's appearance, work etc.

Re: Flattery v Compliment

Far too many people make flattering statements which are untrue. I have noticed this particularly on forums, someone will post a ghastly photo of themselves, for instance, and others will make flattering comments ,which they can't mean, that or they should have gone to Specsavers! I would be highly annoyed if someone paid me a compliment, which was ludicrously untrue. Far from thanking them, I would challenge them and ask why they thought it necessary to tell a lie!

Re: Flattery v Compliment

I guess I have to go by the dictionary on this, I suppose there has to be a word for insincere compliments (nearly said insincere flattery) - You learn something new everyday - well I do....

Re: Flattery v Compliment

Flattery is making insincere comments, usually to further your own ends. Compliments are a polite expression of appreciation.

It is not insincere to pass a genuine compliment.

Re: Flattery v Compliment

I agree Willow - but, I would never be rude to a person who, say has had a new hairstyle and asked what we thought, I would say, just a touch longer or not so curly would suit better, if she asked - if not, say nothing

Re: Flattery v Compliment

How on earth would you know if some one is being sincere or not? You really are laughable. And not in a funny way.

Re: Flattery v Compliment

True enough - people have different tastes...

Re: Flattery v Compliment

Flattery

1. paying of compliments to win favour: an act or instance of complimenting somebody, often excessively or insincerely, especially in order to gain an advantage
2. compliments: complimentary remarks, especially when excessive or insincere

Compliment

1. praise somebody: to express praise or approval of somebody
2. give something to somebody: to give somebody a gift as a sign of respect or honour
3. congratulate somebody: to express congratulations to somebody


Interesting topic PATS. I have not really thought about these 2 words in detail. I had considered them to have a similar meaning until now. They are quite different and I shall take care when using them.

As a digression, what do think of this for a compliment, or is it something else

Margot bumped into Myfanwy in Harvey Nicholls.
“ Darling, I love your outfit” she cooed, following it up with a withering
“ I’ve always loved it”

Was that flattery, complimentary or plain old fashioned bitchiness?

Re: Flattery v Compliment

If 'I' said - 'I've always loved it' - it would be the truth and I'll have it when shes done with it - but, you say 'withering glance' - so, this 'was' insincere and bitchy... All in the way its said too.....