Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

Best way to get revenge on someone is to make a success of your life.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

I have always and always will hold a grudge against my Maths teacher in secondary school, he picked on me something shocking and always singled me out to answer questions he knew I wouldn't know the answer to, he used to make me stand up in front of the class. Now as an adult I am petrified of classroom based courses and suffer dreadful anxiety if I have to attend any, he's dead now but boy has he left his mark. Nasty man.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

Not from childhood no, but a few since I was an adult. I don't have anything to do with people who have been nasty to me, they no longer exist as far as I am concerned. Though one did apologise to me so I tolerate him now.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

I'm the same. I either put things right at the time or move on.

Childhood is a time of learning about life and there's no point in harbouring resentment if you learned from bad experiences. You learn just as much about yourself as you do about the challenges of life. So i do believe the cliche that whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

I would agree with what you said Annie. I feel that we try to take away somebody's pain, and comfort them too often. If we don't let people learn how to deal with problems, how will they ever learn how to deal with life, without help?

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

Like a lot of people I had a difficult childhood and for many years I carried the scars and deep sadness and a grudge towards my father , and at times towards my mother who I missed very much . When in my late 40s my dear mum got very sick and I lived many miles away and was unable to care for her so she was cared for by my father , they had an extremely toxic relationship and I was concerned for her but unable to do anything about it . My father stayed by her side looking after her till the moment she died during that time he was kindness itself towards her .

The moment my mum died and I knew father had been good to her the feelings much more than could be called a grudge just evaporated from me after consuming me most of my life it was a good feeling and set me free .

Life has taught me that we all make dreadful mistakes at times and hurt others in trying to find a life for our self's often unknowingly at the time

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

No I don't hold childhood grudges.
For years I had a simmering hatred of my stepmother who I thought had ruined my chances in life making it necessary for me to leave home and get a live-in job aged 15.
As I got older I learnt it is better to forget resentments, make the best of what you have and get on with life.

I think we only have one life (a bit like only having one go at a game) why waste part of it brooding over something which happened long ago and which cannot be changed.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

[QUOTE=susan m;1427661]Like a lot of people I had a difficult childhood and for many years I carried the scars and deep sadness and a grudge towards my father , and at times towards my mother who I missed very much . When in my late 40s my dear mum got very sick and I lived many miles away and was unable to care for her so she was cared for by my father , they had an extremely toxic relationship and I was concerned for her but unable to do anything about it . My father stayed by her side looking after her till the moment she died during that time he was kindness itself towards her .

The moment my mum died and I knew father had been good to her the feelings much more than could be called a grudge just evaporated from me after consuming me most of my life it was a good feeling and set me free .

Life has taught me that we all make dreadful mistakes at times and hurt others in trying to find a life for our self's often unknowingly at the time[/
QUOTE]

I found your post very touching,..and totally agree with,the last two paragraphs of your post.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

My father was a writer who worked from home so any children had to be quiet when in the house. This was quite an issue so I could only really be a normal child outside or at friends' houses.

Re: Do you hold any grudges going back to childhood?

I have a grudge against a teacher - yes.

When I was seven years old I had to stand up in front of the class & spell 'They' I spelled it with an A - thay. She asked me to repeat it the correct way & I was so terrified of her that I once again spelled it wrong. She hit out at me knocking me on the floor and banging my head on the iron bar of a table that was at the front of the class room.

She dragged me up said 'Sorry I didn't mean to do that' and sent me back to my seat.

Nothing else was said - I didn't tell my parents - just took it for granted that teachers could hit us.

Oh if that had been today eh?