Re: Feeling used!

Well, ain't you more or less deaf? Don't want to appear insensitive but surely that plays a part? Would have thought that feeling 'different' is part of the course? Eh ... that is about it.

Re: Feeling used!

It shouldn't matter, deaf people like the same things we all do, dislike the same things all people need to do is take time to face the person and talk, not rocket science. It's not like Steve is expecting people to learn sign language or something just have the decency to include him in conversations or better still do the work they are paid to do, perhaps he would have time to be life and soul of the party if he wasn't doing so many other people's work alongside his own !

Re: Feeling used!

I understand how you feel Steve. Sometimes it's the most dedicated workers, working quietly in the background, who get the raw deal. There are also people who go off sick at the drop of a hat - especially if they get sick pay.............

Re: Feeling used!

Gosh don't get me started on sick pay where my husband works some people never do a full week, others are off for a year ! When my husband is struggling on they really take the mick IMO

Re: Feeling used!

I too know what its like to be a 'good hardworking' worker. I was one !
I liked to work under pressure, couldn't stand being idle. The difference was for me - I was appreciated.
So for Steve it must be very aggravating, I have witnessed idleness many times in the workplace, I've even had to re-do other peoples work .....

Re: Feeling used!

I have learnt over the years that in all companies there are clicks of people - who are the popular crowd, they go out drinking and socialising - sometimes you can get in and other times you cannot doesent matter how friendly you are. I went out with a group of them a couple of times but I don't like to get roaring drunk. So I was not invited again.

I am a hard worker and get on with the job in hand I do like to have a chat but not at the expense of the work load. Some other people do not have the same ethic.

You cannot fight it, it happens I have had to learn not to beat myself up about it.

Re: Feeling used!

Wise words Julie, and you've hit the nail on the head with the last part of your last sentence.

No-one but Steve knows of his situation, how others treat him, how he interacts, or can't, or how he feels. I empathise Steve, but as I do not suffer your hearing loss I can only go with my own experience of doing everyone's work on top of my own, and feeling ignored by colleagues and management in that there was no support.

I worked for an Indian bank and with all colleagues in my department, including the Manager (!) talking in their own language I was always in isolation and I was heading for deep depression. The white British HR manager would go round the bank telling everyone to speak English. It was like he'd addressed the furniture for the notice they took.

In our old building we were moved about and shared office space with another dept. the typist would save up her holiday allowance and take the whole of December off to go somewhere exotic. The year was, of course, broken up by lots and lots of sick leave, one day her manager gave Jane a lot of work, Jane took sick leave, so guess who was approached to help out?

When that dept moved out we extended into that space and along came Debbie to help me out. Debbie spent all day, every day, on the phone to her boyfriend, her mum, her young son, her sister, her colleagues. One day, the manager of another dept on a different floor asked me to help him. I refused, citing heavy workload of my own, and was summoned to the w/B HR manager, who had just joined, who tore a strip off me! I blamed my new manager (the female Diva) who caused me to suffer shingles through stress. I sat there stunned, thinking 'this is the first time in my working life I've had to endure this'. I couldn't pipe up and say, well Debbie's not doing her fair share, why pick on me?

Later on John and I became more friendly once he realised my good work ethic, but you see, nobody had asked Debbie to help out! Debbie never got into trouble! However, I got her removed from the dept. later on (via new manager - Diva only lasted one year) and she couldn't handle the workload, went off sick and never returned!!

When three relatives died in quick succession I found myself unable to grieve and received antidepressants.

My promotions brought animosity and jealousy from the Indians as they thought one of their own should have got my final top job. I was awarded it through experience and ability (HR manager's words). I was older than her, had had the proper training, having gone to secretarial collage full time while she'd only done shorthand at evening class.

However, my subsequent jobs in 2 different NHS trusts found me with the same problems of finding myself with lazy good for nothings who were quite clever at hiding it.

I could have left that bank in my 17-18 years there (started off as a temp) because it ruined my health so much. When the redundancy package was offered in 2003, 18 months after getting the job as Principal secretary to the top manager, it was a lifeline.

I'm telling you, final retirement this year couldn't come quick enough.

(I'm working on the iPad so getting bit mixed up with timelines, but I've had my share of shit treatment.)

Steve, sorry you're going through this. Been there, done that, got the T shirt. Best of luck in getting it sorted.

Janet xx

Re: Feeling used!

So true Jazzi

Re: Feeling used!

My husband & I both worked at the same job which was very concentrated as we scanned newspapers for clients who needed to see what kind of coverage they were getting.
It required concentration.
Then we merged with another media company that had yakkers going on during the day. When you complained that you couldn't concentrate, you were made to feel like you weren't being objective or whatever. Believe me you sure heard about it if you missed something in the papers tho because you were distracted!

Re: Feeling used!

Thanks for the responses.

I must say here that I'm not unsociable! Far form it!

My approach to work is I'm being paid to do a job so that takes priority, not standing around chatting or gossiping endlessly to other staff members, (NOT just those in my Team!), and Yes, I am deaf but I am approachable when people care to try me, which isn't often to be honest because I've found that generally, people simply cannot deal with deafness!

My tag on here is Deaf not Daft! Why do you think I put that?!

I've had a very hard day again today and for once others have actually commented as I've been out cutting hedges most of the day and it's been very hot: -

I've heard "Can't so-and-so help you with all that?" or "Where's so-and-so then when he's not sneaking off having another fag?"
(It's actually a Line Manager and a two-man team - OK?)

I've set up a countdown online and I've just checked - 779 more days and I can retire! stevmk2