Re: Family Unmoveables.

In that case Jem, guidelines must be put in place by your daughter and she should explain these to her hubby. With the greatest respect, your daughter probably isn't a young woman any longer and needs her rest after working all day.

I know the mother-in-law is welcome, but unless mum-in-law is helping out during her stay, i.e. cooking a meal on your son and daughter's return from work, or doing a bit of dusting, then I can see where the problem lies.

Sounds to me as if your son-in-law is allowing his missus (your daughter) to wait on her hand and foot. If she were disabled, that would be a different tale, but if she's lively, then she should at least do something around the house to alleviate the jobs your daughter has to do after a day's work! Sorry, but this is how I feel.

Re: Family Unmoveables.

I remember in the 70s our in-laws were making a 'state' visit to our home. Our eldest was three and I was heavily pregnant with our second. We lived in a house on the boarding school campus where my husband was a teacher and house master. He was on duty on a Sunday afternoon, one of the lads had hurt themselves and as I was the only person who was available to accompany him to hospital. I left our little one in the care of her grandparents. When I got back a few hours later, well past her bedtime, I discovered that not only wasn't she in bed, she hadn't had her tea! Her grandparents were sitting their with disapproval all over their faces saying they expected their evening meal at 6pm and were hungry. It was our duty to entertain them when they visited us. You can see why they weren't welcome!

Re: Family Unmoveables.

Now then, I find that disgusting. Sorry, but I do. Where I come from, families muck in with each other.

I remember my mum coming to visit us in 1976 when we'd been posted to Worcester, and she was fascinated with the "new-fangled" automatic washing machine. She pulled up a chair in the kitchen to watch it!

Fair play to her though, when the washer stopped, she loaded the washing into the dryer. I told her she didn't need to do anything, but she insisted she wanted to help.

I know this has gone slightly off-topic, but when things get peas over sticks, you have to put your foot down.

Re: Family Unmoveables.

My late father-in-law used to write unpleasant letters to my husband listing his short comings, he became atheist after he realised his fundamentalist Christian upbringing had no basis in reality. The letters were signed 'Your Father' and his full name, just like one would have done in Victorian times!

Re: Family Unmoveables.

Only happened once to us.
We simply said, 'well these few days have flown..we'll take you home in the evening tomorrow..so we can all have dinner together first'....our children were in on the ploy and made lots of nice remarks, and all was said with smiles.

Re: Family Unmoveables.

Antibrown... I agree with you!!

Re: Family Unmoveables.

what happened to an Englishmans home is his castle? I only have invited guests and if any have ever shown an inclination to overstay I have just said "no we agreed .the weekend etc" they just go and I wouldnt invite them again. You have to be honest and tell them they are overstaying. I learned to stop letting people walk over me years ago

Re: Family Unmoveables.

Sorry Mollie, but if a person is an invited guest then they should not be expected to do any work in your home, I would never dream of asking my daughter or son or any other guest to do work in my home.

Re: Family Unmoveables.

I expect my kids to help out when staying over, just as I help out when over at their places.

Re: Family Unmoveables.

I'm with you on this Bob.
I would never invite some one to stay at my home and expect them to work in exchange.
But I will say that all of my guests have insisted on doing the washing up. I would not expect or want them to cook. My kitchen is my territory