Are You Estranged From Your Siblings?

I am as I mentioned in the Parents thread.

Since my mom passed away, things were said afterwards that cannot be forgiven & in my opinion, absence does not make the heart grow fonder.

We all used to be close even though, me being the youngest, I grew up almost like an only child. My siblings were all about 22 months apart, then I came along 8 years after the last.

They say you can't choose your family & it's so true. Even though all of them are very decent people, have families etc & one brother is a Toronto Firefighter Captain, I would not choose any of them as friends.

I have my family with my husband & our sanctuary of animals, birds plus the close people I choose to email to a lot & they all make me happy. Even if I found myself alone, I would not seek out my brothers & sister.

Re: Are You Estranged From Your Siblings?

Sad isn't it? I am close to 2 of my 3 sisters, not sure what happened with the one who's become estranged - I hope we can make up at some point in the future.

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I was youngest of 3, 11 years between me and my next sister, 16 years after the eldest. My eldest sister died earlier this year, my elder sister lost her husband a few years ago now and returned here from the US.
When my sister returned here it became obvious she was not the person we thought she was, every visit we had to her & her husband was "staged" she turned out to be a nasty alcoholic, abusive and greedy. So much so that I needed counselling to deal with my relationship with her, I was advised to let her get on with it and not allow her to affect me, in other words ignore her.
She's very wealthy and since then has tried to buy the attention of two of my kids, even to the point of saying if they didn't do what she wanted, she would cut them out of her will.
As she's already told another member of the family that her will was changed, she's cut off her nose to spite her face as now there is no earthly reason why any of us would be interested in her.
I wish she was the person I thought she was, we could have shared so much, I miss my eldest sister as she was the only person I had left to phone & tell my news to, about how the kids are doing and what daft things I've been doing.

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I've got no problem with my brother or sister - they're (as far as I know) very good people with successful lives and lovely families. It was simply that, as a colleague put it, "My parents had 3 only children".
We have very little in common and no reason to have any contact.
I don't think my siblings have any contact with each other etiher.

Like you, AutumnColour, I have my family and friends. My siblings are just people I knew from the past. My wife was an only child and has no contact with her surviving distant relatives.

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My 3 siblings are just interested in being with their own families (I am the only one who never found a husband) and though youngest sister lost her partner 3 years ago (not the father of her children), she still has her own family to turn to.

Who do I have? Well, could count them on one hand, but they too are busy with their own lives. Only one lady at the allotment likes to give and receive hugs from any of us, and I look forward to that, sad as it sounds!

Youngest sister, when meeting her, would 'offer a cheek' for ME to kiss, but her two daughters give strong hugs. Sadly don't see them much.

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GW, that quote seems very apt! Never thought of it like that. I get so envious seeing siblings on Facebook (immediate and sort of family) having a very close and loving relationship, that continues even as they grow older. They see each other all the time, publicly say 'I love you.'

I am a very loving person, and have a lot of love and affection to give. Sadly, recipients are thin on the ground.

(OK, going to stop posting maudlin thoughts before you all start having an Airplane moment...anyone remember the scenes on the plane?! )

Yes I need a pet but I am waiting till I've had a few more holidays yet. And can't decide between a few guinea pigs or a couple of kitty kats.

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I have parented both my sister's children as they both failed badly as parents, that has caused some problems I doubt we will ever recover from. One sister as I have written about here before is a hoarder and we have cleaned up after her several times but last time we had to say no more. My other sister went off the rails rather when she was younger and then was reborn later as some sort of posh lady saint, who quite honestly thinks she is better than the rest of us, she isn't !
My husband and the kids and dogs are enough for me these days I think.

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My only sibling died n 2006, aged 47, she carried the woes of the world, fortunately we communicated in a fashion, never found the bottom line, c'est la vie.

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Shame. I have 2 sisters who dote on me. They are clever yet reasonable and provide unlimited support whenever, or if, it is needed. Tis a blessing to have them.

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Well then, you don't need us!

lol, that's great for you, tho.